Cocoon of Chaos

Date in the woods

 

 

I love dates, not the fruit, but the thing the mister and I used to do a lot pre-kiddos. In the beginning of parenting, dates were a big deal that involved big preparations, new outfits, and hefty babysitting and cocktail bills. However, as time has gone on, we've learned as much as we still love getting all dapper and heading out, it is nice to replace my heels with boots and head to the woods. It's not where we're going that matters so much, but rather who are with. 

So, today started with us making a nice breakfast at home, reading in blissful silence for 30 minutes, then heading out to the woods. A light dust of snow speckled the ground and it was just so lovely, so splendidly silent and serene. A nice recharge that we needed so very much. 

I happened upon an Instagram feed, called Unboxed, a service that sends you a monthly box of date night activities to keep the spark, the spontaneity and the fun in dating. I loved this idea but also knew I'd enjoy my ideas better than what comes in a box. This idea has really inspired me to think outside of the box in planning dates. I have a date night category on this blog o'mine and am committed to blogging two different date ideas a month. If you're interested, curious, whatever, hit the subscribe button! Have a wonderful weekend, my friends.

 

A Year of Dates: No. 1 with No. 1

In keeping with my goal of 12 dates per person in my household, Bea's turn was next. It just so happened (thanks, Mum) that the other 2 had plans, so the mister and I had our oldest all to ourselves. It was lovely but challenging at the same time. Let's start with the lovely...

We headed out for a walk in the woods, which was pure magic. It was a mix of snow, sun, ice, and running water. 

This walk in the woods felt different, in some way. Bea is growing up, there is no doubt that, but she is also trying to figure out her place in this world. This is no easy task. It is so very hard to know when to step in, when to step out; when to speak, when to listen; when to hug, when to give space. I was talking to a friend the other day with a girl this same age and we discussed how when they are little, we have books that give us details of each month and what to expect. There is nothing for tweens simply because each day is so very different and so unpredictable. I am quite secure in my parenting the early years, but to be honest, my friends, this age is keeping me up at night. I know in my heart we've laid a solid foundation of love, ethics, and a sharp moral compass, but it is hard to let go. It is hard knowing I have to do and it is harder knowing she needs me to. This walk in the woods started as a quiet one, but then morphed into us discussing the message in The Hunger Games. She is loving that series and as much as I wasn't sure if she was ready for it, our discussions about it are proving me wrong. I'm thankful for those books because it is a way to get her talking to us. Believe me, I know this is all normal, but it is hard. It is not "my baby growing up" syndrome, I don't have that at all, it is more of navigating these murky waters of pre-adolescence choppy with crushes, drama, and attitude. Like the picture below, I feel like I'm walking on a narrow bridge with her sometimes.

But I know the treacherous walk is full of slips from both of us and in the end, we start the walk all over. I adore this girl of mine for so many reasons, but I'm really beginning to like her as a person, beyond her just being my daughter. I'm just so smitten with the compassionate, bright, creative, and quirky girl she is becoming.

The walk began with her walking ahead of us and ended with her hand in mine. A perfect date indeed.

A Year of Dates: Double Dates in a Week!

As I blogged before, I resolved to make this a year of making time for those I love by scheduling a date a month with the mister, each one of the kiddos, and some of my friends. It happened as such that I had two of these lovely dates, one with Pippa and one with a friend, in one week!

My date with Pippa was a walk to the beach at the end of our street after a magical dusting of snow. This little lady of mine loves to be outside and we both really needed to get out of the house. Having the one on one time with her was so lovely. It is so hard, sometimes, to make time for every one of the kiddos. We want them to make sure they know how much we adore them individually and want to know who they are. As we crunched the snowflakes on the sand, she asked me so many questions about who my grandparents were and what they were like. There was not a tinge of sadness sharing these special people with her as we walked, but rather such joy in sharing the funny moments of my childhood. As we walked home, she held my hand, squeezed it and said, "Mummy, I'm so lucky to have you for a mummy. You just make my life so great!" With tears in my eyes, I smiled and squeezed that little hand back. 

And my other date was an off the cuff walk in the woods with a friend. It is very hard to make time for friends, with kids' schedules, sicknesses, and traveling spouses, but the cards fell right and we had a glorious walk in the woods. It was cold, but I was full of warmth from laughter, understanding, and support. It is so easy to busy our calendars with playdates for the kids, that we often forget about our own friendships. We need that time just as much as our kiddos. To my dear friend, KP, thank you, as always for making me laugh until I cry. I cannot tell you enough how much I love you.

A Year of Dates: 1 with the Mister

One of my resolutions this year was to have a monthly date with each of my loves: 12 with Devin, 12 with Bea, 12 with Pippa, 12 with Oliver and 12 with some of my friends. It is important to set aside one on one time with those I love and I really wanted to make it happen this year. First up, the mister.

this picture was in the restaurant we went to, I just love this place.

I wanted the dinner to be about us, not about the house, the kids, or our jobs. So, I posed Devin a challenge: think of 5 questions to ask me and I will answer them honestly. I had to do the same for him and let me tell you, it was so wonderful. I must admit, Devin thought of some very thoughtful questions that rather stumped me, but it was so fun to think, to discuss, and to laugh together uninteruppted. We've been together for almost 17 years and I actually learned some new things about this fab guy of mine! I highly recommend the task. 

How about you, what is your favorite thing to do on  a date? I'd happily take some inspiration for my future 11 dates!

A Family Date Night with Samurais

The mister is on a lengthy trip currently and we try very hard to have a little extra fun before he leaves. This little man of ours is currently OBSESSED with ninjas and samurais and the girls LOVE art, so we thought our sans kids date at the Museum of Fine Arts Boston (see here) would be just as fun with kids. As luck would have it, Wednesday nights are free, so we prayed for good behavior and headed into the city. Our prayers were answered with a wee bit of traffic so the little man got a quick cat nap before heading in, which was a key component to our successful evening.

mesmerized by the samurai

in awe of Van Gogh

treats for all...rice krispy treats for the littles, chilled wine for the bigs

 

this was a moving exhibit. quilters from all over the country designed a square in honor of the Boston Marathon bombings. A literal representation of our country coming together, stitch by stitch, to support one another. It was so beautiful and moving.

Vlog: Family Date Night

The mister and I have been trying very hard to have more date nights and while getting ready for one such occasion a few weeks ago, Ava asked, "Well, what do you do on dates anyways?" So, I promised her we would go on a family date night in the near future. Well, the near future arrived last night. . So, here you have it. Our night began with an early evening movie, Epic, which happened to be Oliver's very first movie, then moved onto one of our favorite dinner places, Sugar Cane, and was supposed to end with coffee and gelato at a local favorite, but they ended up being closed. So, as a consolation prize, we put on jammies and played a game of Charades. My heart is full this morning because we all had such a blast together and have plans to have more family date nights. Bea is obsessed with a great app, Video Star, on her iPod and wanted to make a movie about our night...Happy Memorial Day Weekend!

 

Date Night at the MFA Boston

It just so happened to be the 16th anniversary of our first date last night, no, we're not really that corny, it just worked out that we could get a babysitter. We actually had a hard time deciding what to do. We didn't want to sit and sip cocktails or sit in a quiet movie theatre. So, my genius husband found out the Museum of Fine Arts in Boston was free after 4 on Wednesdays. So, we hightailed it into this great city of ours.

                                                                                                        

I would be a liar to say I was not a bit concerned to head into the city after Monday's tragic events, but all that vanished as we crossed over the Tobin Bridge. Yes, it was strange. It wasn't the same Boston I love...it was better. You could feel the life, the love, and the resiliency. As we drove along the Charles River, life continued: people were taking their nightly jogs, kids were at soccer practice, and little toddlers were running around the playground. People are moving on, honoring the everyday heroes and the lives lost or altered by this tragedy by living their own lives.

So, I was not only inspired by Van Gogh, Degas, Renoir, Rodant, Picasso, and all the awe inspiring work inside the museum, but also by the vibrancy of this city.  We left the museum and it was a quiet ride home with this dapper date of mine because we were both so overwhelmed. Silenced by emotion, appreciation, and hope. It was indeed our best date yet.