Cocooon of Chaos

My pout period is over

I'm not sure why but for the past month, it seems a dark cloud has been following me. Could be the miserable beginning to summer, pregnancy hormones, and/or the life adjustment of being at home again. Whatever the case may be, I am officially ending these dreary days. I have had my time and now I need to find my happy pants and wear them proudly.

One way that always seems to help is to write a Grateful list, where I list things I am grateful for; it always humbles me and makes my troubles seem trivial. So here goes:

1. I am grateful for the time I have with my girls, even when it feels I can not take another minute of their bickering or naughtiness.

2. I am grateful for a husband who puts up with my moods and supports me in whatever I do.

3. I am grateful for my house, we have put a ton of work into this house and I can not imagine living anywhere else. Although I could really do without all the housework!

4. I am grateful for the ocean at the end of my street. Everyday I step outside, I look at the vast openness of the Atlantic and know the world is wide open for me and my girls.

5. I am grateful for my dogs who remind me everyday of what loyalty is; they really get the shit end of the stick but never fail to show me how much they love us all. I could do without their dookie and dog hair, but they are a small price to pay.

6. I am grateful for this little baby growing inside of me. It took us off guard, but as each day passes, I fall in love more and more each day. I constantly doubt myself and my abilities to handle three children, but I know anything that comes my way, I can manage. It might be chaotic, but that is a recurring theme in my life. I think I may have an addiction to it, actually, simply because in chaos, we find who we truly are and what we are capable of as people.

7. I am grateful for my family. Every family is strife with problems, but love and obligation holds us all together. I know if I needed anything at all, I can turn to my family without question. They make me a better person everyday.

There, I feel better.

6.

Here we go again...

That there is the third addition to the Grant family. I am finally in the "safe zone", which felt like an eternity, but am grateful that this little baby is viable. I found out I was pregnant June 3rd and after the shock wore off, the worry began. In my heart, I wanted to be excited but my head just could not shake the trauma of losing my last pregnancy. I knew I would not rest until I heard that little heartbeat and sure enough on July 7th, that glorious sound echoed through the examination room. Tears began spilling uncontrollably, both a cathartic mix of releasing worry and allowing myself to finally feel joy and excitement that I am having a baby. I was also lucky enough to get an ultrasound and see the baby, which was amazing. No matter how many times you do this, the sheer wonder of it all never fades. The baby was moving around like crazy and seeing that little monster made all the worry, stress, and anxiety disappear out of my body. Of course the financial, emotional, physical, and mental worries of having three children continue to linger, but I know that anything that comes way, I am able to handle.  As I've said before, I come from a long line of women who dealt with insurmountable odds but rode through life with grace, poise, and humor. If I can do half of what they did, I am happy.

So...watch out world, here comes another Grant baby! For the record, my prediction is a boy. We'll see if I'm right soon enough! Ava and Lily are vying for a girl and already have names picked out; Ava's choice is Grape Raspberry and Lily's favorite is Lipstick Headband. Lovely.

 

Weekly Trip to the Library

"You must read to live." ~Flaubert

My favorite place to go alone is the library. Growing up, our libraries were horrible and under used but since moving to the East Coast, my love for libraries has ignited once again. How can you not love a place that has free books--any book you desire! I love browsing through the stacks, finding new authors, and getting lost amongst the books. My love has transferred to both my girls and they genuinely look forward to going to the library every week. They each plop themselves down with a pile of books and are content for quite a while. Lovely. So, every week, I will post some interesting finds. This week we checked out:

Love this book! Great for letter recognition for my 3 year old, letter sounds for my 5 year old and appreciation of fine art for all! Very fun and beautiful.

 Can I tell you how much I love Fancy Nancy?! I love her because she is not afraid to be herself and the author does a great job of mixing in vocabulary to her stories. This is a cute book because it strays away from her fanciness and gets her out in nature, examining plants. Each book I encounter, pleases me and Ava is enamored by her character and loves learning new words like exquisite, boquet, and merci. I am firm believer in introducing languages and I love hearing french words in my house, thanks to Jane O'Connor.

I can not find a decent link for our chapter book but it is entitled, "The Spiderwick Chronicles The Field Guide Book 1". Looks like it is filled with adventure, magic, fairies, and amazing illustrations. Very excited to start this one today.

So, if you are so lucky to have a library near you, please visit. Take a break from life and get lost in the books. You won't be sorry.